Father, what qualities should I seek in a man?
The most important quality in a partner.
Solomates!
An extract from my new book (PRE-ORDER NOW): It's Not You, It's We (Notes on Understanding Love)
Don’t worry—the tone of this book is a bit different in some parts, but it still features my typical conversational, ranty, and occasionally complainy (yet sometimes wise) style that you’re accustomed to.
P.S. It’s still in draft mode, so please ignore any typos or grammatical errors—they’ll all be fixed once I send it to the editors. Pre-ordering really helps me gauge the number of books needed for the next print run, so please do!
In other news, I’ll be retiring The Book You Wish You Had Read Before Marriage once the new book comes out before the month ends. I haven’t announced this publicly yet (well, I guess this counts as kinda public), but I believe books should be preserved like art. I’m not a big fan of printing books just to have extra copies lying around—especially considering all that paper comes from trees. That said, I’ve reached my physical sales target, and I think I’m happy with that. The book will still be available in audio and ebook formats, but the physical copies will only be owned by those who already have one. It’s not too late to get a copy!
Enough from me, enjoy the preview!
The King of Merdian made a single request on his deathbed: for his daughters to find husbands worthy of sharing the throne. The law dictated that if no male heir presented himself, the strongest warrior in the army would marry the eldest daughter, ensuring a strong and powerful nation. Yet, with his body failing, and surrounded by his closest advisors—against their wishes—the king summoned his daughters to his bedside. He instructed them to tell him what kind of man they deemed fit to join them in ruling the kingdom.
“What qualities will you seek in the man who will rule Merdian by your side?” he asked.
The eldest daughter held her father’s frail hand and spoke. “I would marry the Prince of Selby. He is a strong fighter who will protect the nation from intruders and villains.”
The king’s brow furrowed into a frown. “He is strong because he wins wars? A man’s strength should not be reduced to his fists. Remember this, my children,” he said, addressing all his daughters. “It takes a different kind of strength to break men than it does to raise a family and a nation.”
Blushing, the eldest rose, smoothed her gown, and took a step back.
The second daughter stepped forward, and the king repeated his question.
The second daughter, wise and quick-witted, avoided repeating her sister’s answer. “I would consider the General of Ducketts. He is a renowned hero and a wealthy man. His riches can take care of our family, the nation, and secure treaties. We would never lack in your absence.”
The king lifted his head slightly, his heart warming at the memory of the nights they played chess together in her youth. He chuckled. “You are the heir to Merdian, the greatest throne of the past hundred years. Unless you squander it, the wealth of this kingdom will last generations. If riches alone made a good man, I would have been a better husband and father.”
“You were… are the best of fathers,” the second daughter said, her eyes glistening with tears.
“I could have been better,” the king said, stroking her cheek gently.
He turned to his third daughter, who sat by the grand piano, her fingers tangled in her hair. “What about you?”
Startled, she jumped and whispered, “Please, Father, I can’t.”
“It’s okay, my cherry blossom,” the king said, motioning to his middle daughter. “Bring your sister.”
Reluctantly, the third daughter shuffled over, tears streaming down her face, and joined her sisters by the mantel of the bedchamber. All three daughters stood together, their arms around each other for support.
“I would marry a kind man. Like you, Father,” the third daughter managed to blurt out before collapsing into tears.
The king stroked her hair as she sobbed into his chest. A kind man was a good man, but at times, a weak man. Kindness without discernment had led many nations to ruin. Even in the Good Book, Joseph’s brothers had taken advantage of his kindness.
As the king comforted his daughter, a loud crash boomed through the room. The door burst open, startling everyone—including the king. Standing at the entrance was his fourth daughter, Athena, still in her hunting gear. The king sighed in relief; she had made it just in time.
Ama, the warrior of the sisters, rushed to her father’s side, sweat dripping from her brow. When the king posed his question to her, she paused, her eyes sharp with determination.
“Father, it is my duty to marry a God-fearing man—someone who lives by faith and the Word of the Lord.”
The king nodded, impressed by her strong, confident answer. It was wise but cautious. He knew his daughter already held affections for the Duke of Gladesmore’s son, a God-fearing young man.
“A man’s relationship with God does not always reflect his relationship with others. Many men have justified their injustices using the Lord’s name. Faith alone is not enough—”
A stabbing pain wrecked the king’s body, and he coughed violently. His daughters gathered around, supporting him through the pain. It wouldn’t be long now.
Turning to his youngest daughter, who sat in the corner away from the group, he beckoned her forward. She was the baby of the family, adored by all who looked into her wide, innocent eyes.
“What about you, my dear?”
The youngest daughter hesitated, her voice barely a whisper. “I would marry the baker’s son, Father.”
She paused, sensing the disapproval of her sisters, but continued.
“When he came to deliver a loaf of bread, I gave him a silver coin and skipped off. Yet, he called me back to return two bronze coins, saying I had overpaid. It was the first time anyone had done that. The other bakers would always take whatever I gave without question. He is honest, Father.”
The king chuckled—a wheezing sound that surprised even himself. The laughter hurt, but it was worth the pain.
“Nothing is more important than honesty,” he said. “Marry an honest man—a man honest to his values, his disciplines, his God, and himself. A man who is honest with himself will be honest with his wisdom, his wealth, and his nation. Honesty is invaluable. Be honest women, and entertain only men who are honest to their hearts and their people.”
He looked at all his daughters, his legacy. His eyes watered, and as the world darkened around him, he smiled one final time.
This is an extract from my new book (PRE-ORDER) now: It's Not You, It's We (Notes On Understanding Love)
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